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Summerland Pumpkin/ With my sister

Do you ever see Nick in your dreams? Have you seen the jungle vine stairway he has, leading to his quarters...? It's like a hammock of velvety vines. Sometimes you refuse to climb it because you forget that you can.
In place of the park apartment complex and expo lake; there's a fancy baseball field and natural tropical Hot Spring: north of which, trails off slowly into wilderness and where concerts are held.

If I'm lucky, instead of finding my reoccurring dream of Kirsten's wedding; held eerily on the school playground blacktop; I find a stage; empty and wanting me.
Come that you mention it; I never actually find an open door either. What I end up doing is flying out a window and into another. Once I found Destiny in a room that I could enter but not exit and she was stuck that in the windows were brick walls.

I have crazy dreams that I was the one with cancer, living in the back bedroom of my grandmas house, married to a violin. And this interesting hospital for young patients who still wanted a college education. Those dream scare me because I feel like I lead a more for filling life in them than I do now: but my family so devastated by my sickness, I cannot allow myself to experience my joy for shaming it away. Almost like reality but with different discourse.
One thing that makes me nostalgic for dreaming, is the fact that I have a preference for it's exotic geographical design. As a destination it is more consistent. If I go where once, I don't get lost on my way back; with the exception of giant buildings on the insides. Or not realizing I've ever become lost because of being so pleased where i find myself.
Recently, I had a very realistic – yet not so believable or enjoyable dream; my uncle Bill somehow swept me Off to Idaho i while I remained asleep until I awoke in his guest bed. He did this to surprise me – to be sweet; but I was angry – i did not have marijuana, and I had to keep my displeasure secret. He would be utterly livid to discover that i wanted it, in real life and in the dream. I also seem to have been much younger in Idaho. I was very glad to wake up back in my own space.
Speaking of space; One balmy summer night in 2012, I turned my fan up too high. which influenced an irritating dream: I was in my skimpies, and giant; Riding on top of a spaceship not truly big enough to safely fit me. It trembled under my weight. My feet, and head hung off the sides. I laid on my back. The surface was very slippery, and I didn't have a bungee or belt; My position, awkward, exhaustive, and non negotiable.
they were going so fast, it made the breeze arctic, and deafening.– I became very angry, and afraid for my safety, and theirs. I realized they were trying to to be helpful, but I couldn't legitimize it- . I felt mistreated by them. I was hitchhiking in outer space, and I thought, they should not have stopped for my giant ass; knowing their shit was wAy too small. It would've been more responsible of them to fly on by, not welcoming me into a predicament that endangered both parties.
I didn't know how to ask them to let me off.
I have never been more homesick; and in my own bed. -smh-.

I just made up a song called "Summerland Pumpkin". I don't know what its about and a bit scared to listen to it yet. It felt so good, like a masterpiece; it had to be... Don't want to ruin that moment deconstructing and potentially hating what i hear

it only caught three seconds of the 2+ minute freestyle! You know why, I think: because it WAS amazing, and Amps really loved it: but i had the audacity to doubt it for even a split second, so he decided to keep it to himself; The only way it can stay sacred. Maybe it was about the skyyy!!! *_*
The first 3 seconds, are just enough for me to remember the tune. For some reason, when I come up with a tune...(sentence frag)

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