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I've always hated the idea of the military, because it meant that our dads, boyfriends, brothers, and the bravest of our sisters, will be taking a journey into a place where the only thing known of it is that they will be required to fight somehow,or protect their fighters from some heavy duty weaponry. They will have to risk their lives, and risk their lives, and some of them will lose their lives. Some of them; The ones who enlisted young, will die before they have the chance to begin their lives. I'm not saying the fight isn't important, but I don't think I realize the meaning of it. I don't know if any of the people who take real risks in the scenario truly understand their part.
For Chris, and Dylan
Just a Man
Silly man. I don't need your permission, I know I am your biggest fan, still.
And still, You're not that great.
Sometimes you seem like so much more than what you are.
You really are just a man.

I feel very hurt that you don’t seem to understand the integral role you play in the situation I am going through with my extended/long lost family. Since we have always referred to each other as sisters, I thought you would at least partially understand the hole I have in my heart, and the pain I have harbored regarding this situation through my whole life. It bothers me that you can remember seeing a childhood photo of me in the past, and not being able to recognize it, yet you couldn’t recall any memory of the photograph itself, to compare it to the one I showed you.
I may have overreacted in anger towards you for that. Having an eidetic memory seems like a constant punishment. It feels like
i care more for you, and every detail of your existence, than you do for me.

I do understand that you are going through a difficult time as well. I extend my heart to you, and also know that although you have been hurt over lost love before, it pales in comparison to this pain you are experiencing now; You are probably surprised at the impact, the simple detail of Marcus’ reciprocation in the matter, has on its overall effects on you.

I’m afraid it’s true, the only apology I received from you included cursing. There was also an “I’m sorry, what did I do now?” you sent, before you knew why I was mad. I am unable to be clear on the tone you intended, but I took it with sarcasm- as though I am too easily upset. This is probably true of me. I am extremely oversensitive lately. Still, your comments toward me were asinine, which greatly surprised me. I thought you would be more compassionate. You had a point that I also owe you an apology for reacting so harshly in the beginning, instead of being patient and explaining my feelings. It’s just that I honestly feel that you should know me better by now. It’s very disappointing.

knowing the way you behaved over the Dr.s; I knew that when you found someone, you would forget me. I already knew, so it doesn't shock me. It's just that, even though I want you to have someone,and be happy, I still want you to remember me. You never really have though- that's just something I think I must have wished so hard for... the wish put on a fact costume for haloween. You never remember anything I say
You don't care to know me.


Kismet Witstatic

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September 2018